Why does everybody hates Justin Bieber? Just leave that girl alone!

Knock Knock Who's there Kevin Kevin who Kevin your friend dumbass

Your mother's so fat she occupies more space than a thin person does and is more likely to bump into environmental objects.

What did the farmer say to the other farmer? We are both farmers.

A blonde asks, "How come i cant get this to go in there?" However no one replies because no one is there.

A black man walks into a bar and he orders a margarita. The bartender says that the margaritas are exceptionally delicious in this bar. He was right.

why did everyone laugh at the kid in the wheel chair as he entered the room? he was poor

Why did Mary fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Mary.

Why did the train stop? - It was surrounded by elephants

So a blond, a brunette, a ninja, a pirate, a priest, a rabbi, a mathematician and an engineer all walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What, is this some kind of joke?"

Wanna hear a joke? No? Oh

A duck walks into a bar, clearly ignoring the 'No Ducks Allowed' sign that had been placed in the window to prevent comedic scenarios.

Roses are Red I shit in your Stew When you eat it The joke is on you

Jesus can can WALK on WATER, but Chuck Norris can SWIM in it.

Why did the Pakistani man cry when the Nigerian man was killed in a terrorist attack? They were lovers.

I like my women like bacon. Greasy and full of wrinkels

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Since when is it any of your business? Cant we live in a world where chickens can cross the road freely without having there motives questioned?

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, horse, we don't serve your kind here." The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse," says the bartender, "I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse, are you deaf? I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out, knocking over a stool with his tail.

Q: Why did Robin Williams kill himself? A: Because he was jealous of all the attention that Phillip Seymour Hoffman was getting.

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

why doesnt john lipka have a job? because the unemployment rate is high these days.

How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None...they can cook in the dark.

What does Pluto and a creamsicle have in common? Neither of them are a planet.

What did one bulbasaur say to one squirtle? Well, first off, pokemon are virtual animals created solely for the enjoyment of entertaining japanese children and causing seizure episodes. This fictional creation then migrated to an american tv market, still maintaining their superficial existence while continuing to promote slavery and the use of round balls that capture your problems and propagate winning through random ball throwing. They are fake, and as they are fake, the bulbasaur said "we are fake"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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