what is green and has weels? grass i was kidding about the weels.

What did the Irishman say to the German? "Sorry, do you have the time?"

What do you call a fly with no wings? Disabled

Whats the difference between a house and a truck? Ones a truck the other one is a house

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

Why didn't they let the black people play baseball? Because they're bigoted bastards.

Knock Knock? Who's There? Sgt Constable Ian. Sgt Constable Ian Who? It's Sgt Constable Ian - I'm here to see you about your alleged rape charges.

How do I want to die? From Chuck Norris killing me, that would be an honor.

Why did timmy's face turn red? Early that morning Timmy was brutally attacked by the local street gang which proceeded to smack timmy's face with a baseball bat and smearing the blood with a dirty rag.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

A man is driving down the highway. He falls asleep at the wheel due to his case of narcolepsy, and dies in a fiery car crash.

what is the difference between a picture of brooklyn decker and my grandma....i jack off to the picture of my grandma

What happened to the boy with no family? He died in a tragic car accident along with his family

Whats worse than getting a parking ticket? The Bubonic Plague

How many electricians does it take to screw on a light bulb? 1

a horse walks into a bar the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse replies "my wife died yesterday." the next day the bartender wakes up and realises that it didn't happen and that he is a drunk asshole with no life.

What do you call a griraffe and a duck who's favorite colors are both purple? A coincidence in which two unrelated species have the same preference in colorant hues.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 and 7 are non-living objects and cannot show fear or anger.

Roses are red, yup.

A man walks into a bar. He is rushed to the hospital and has his wounds treated.

What's black and breaks your stove when falling from a tree? Your stove

why dont black people celebrate thanksgiving? kfc is closed on holidays

Women's Rights..

Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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