Sam Hengal.

What do you call a bright orange fish? A gold fish.

there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

Where do you find a dead hooker? where you left her.

What do Helen Keller and Beethoven have in common? They both died wondering what the hell their last words were.

Your mom is soo black , she can go naked to a funeral.

There was a Jewish man and a German man why was it akward? Because one of them farted

What are the biggest ants in the world? Ants under a magnifying glass.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. sama bin laden, is coming for you.

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he has no sense of living and no muscles to move.

What happens if you jump on barbed wire, but break your fall? You hurt your arm as well.

Two Jews are sitting in a large oven. They realize it is a dangerous place to be and get out of the oven.

An Irishman walked into a pub.... He never left.

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one, but he may forget to finish the task due to his Alzheimer's.

knock knock? whos there? danielle danielle who? danielle the liar...hehe

A: Why do you look like a dog? B: Idk.

whats not funny and has access to a computer and reasonable internet? Me

Chuck Norris tried to return some jeans to Target and when they didn't give him his money he kickeed them in the face.

What do you call a fat guy running on the street? Nothing because you should respect his effort trying to improve his health.

What is the difference between a painting and Jesus? It only takes one nail to put up a painting

A man walks outside and sits down to eat his sandwich.

Whats white and sticky? Glue.

Q: Why did Jimmy not have balls? A: A terrible, terrible sand paper accident.

If a man is called a manly man, what is a dude called? A dudely dude.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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