Yo momma so normal, she got married, had three kids and then lived a dull but contented life.

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Robert Palmer: Doctor Doctor give me the news! Doctor: You have contracted lung cancer and AIDS. You will die before Christmas.

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Q; Whats the hardest part about nailing a dead baby to a wall? A; my dick while doing it.

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Why did the Asian student do well in school? Because he worked hard and studied everyday

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Why did the little boy rush downstairs to the living room on Christmas morning? because he heard his mother screaming rape.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She technically could have, she was physically able, but cars were not invented yet, and even if they were it is unethical for any humane person to let a blind and def person drive.

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Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Eating the apple.

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Jamie: Peter your hands smell like cows! Jason: eeh no they smell like cows balls

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What do u when life gives u lemons? U put them in your iced tea.

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Q: Why did the boy cross the road? A: Because he was getting chased by a pedophile

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A man walks into a bar. He is knocked unconscious, and passers-by rush to his aid.

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What's green and has wheels? grass... i lied about the wheels

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jasper walks into a bar, he sees an elephant and can't believe his eyes. he says "HORGWARSH!"

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What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew?

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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Roses are red,violets are blue,hit me once I will break you to Roses are red,violets are blue,I will kick your ass, as hard as to

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This sentence will not end the way you octopus.

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Comes a giraffe on a scooter to the hospital and asks: 'can I have some flour?'.

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What did the newborn get on it's birthday? A life

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How do you catch a predator? You throw a beartrap at a child.

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"Hey ask me if i'm fat" "Are you fat" "Leave me alone"

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osama is obame quincadence or aluminatti????

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What do you call a man with a limp? A limping man.

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whats something naked and nailed to a cross? jesus, idiot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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