Charlie Sheen

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because women have the same rights as men thanks to the 19th amendment and sexism needs to die.

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what do chinese kids make for fathers day? shoes

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Why was the lady afraid of rocks? Because her husband was stoned.

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So a blond, a brunette, a ninja, a pirate, a priest, a rabbi, a mathematician and an engineer all walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What, is this some kind of joke?"

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What do you call a Caucasian in Russia? Russian.

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Why did a black man toss a bowl into the air? Because he just got it from the microwave and it was extremely hot.

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What word starts with N and ends with R that you never want to call a black person? Neighbor.

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What happens when metal and ice collide together? The Titanic

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What's cold, tired, wet, and starving? A girl up at 4:00 am that just came out of a cold shower.

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Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 8 had a lot of PCP went crazy and shoved a gun down 6's throat

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What's a foot long and slippery, a slipper

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Why did the bear turn red? Because he was emBEARessed. Nah just kidding, a hunter shot him.

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What did the farmer say to the cow that asked for food? No.

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Why didn't little Timmy see the bus right before it hit him? Because he was blind

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What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

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A black man walks into a bar full of white people. And then... He orders his drink.

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Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No. okay? Why did the chicken cross the road? why? because its motor skills allowed it to cross. dude, seriously? What did Jimmy's grandmother get him for Christmas? What?. Nothing she died two years ago. that's horrible. When did she die? On his birthday. Dude, stop! Wait how did she die? Fine, How? She was driving down the road and swerved to miss a chicken. oh. And what did she hit? UGGG What? Thankfully not me. because I wasn't the tree. :0 oooooooooooooh

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A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says, "You know, you have a steering wheel down your pants?" The pirate says, "I know, I was just raped by a group of men who thought it would be funny to humiliate me as much as possible. The bartender then called 911 seeing that a horrible crime had just been committed.

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A Jew, A priest and a Muslim go into a pub,put their differences aside and have a good time!

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This guy was walking down the street and a homeless guy asked him for money. The guy said "Why don't you get a job?" So the homeless guy began to cry because all he wanted was a dime not to be humiliated.

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a man was hired for a job. he made a lot of money and was able to support his family.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I haven't been able to deal Since the day that I lost you. Now these roses bleed red And these violets cry blue I think of you in memories Do you think of me too?

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Haikus usually make sense, but sometimes they don't refrigerator.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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