Whats worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple...

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What's green and red all over? That terminally ill child's vomit.

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What's the difference between a cow? Trick question—cows eat carrots!

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A man walks into a bar and says ow. Two men walk into a bar, which is weird, because the second guy should have seen it coming.

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There's nothing more natural than the coals under the fire...

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What did the Zen Buddhist say in the hamburger store? He said, "Make me one with everything."

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Your mother is so fat that she is considered morbidly obese. In fact, she should seriously consider a weight loss diet to reduce her risk of heart disease and diabetes.

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What's the oppicite of brown???? Something not brown.

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A blind man crosses the street... he is hit by a car

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WHATS A GREAT RAVE TUNE KANE !!!!! TUCKER !!!!!!!! DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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How do you choke a lawyer? You squeeze his neck until he stops breathing.

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Why doesn't Julius Caesar ever use a cell phone? Because he died in 44 BC.

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What happened when Stephen Hawking tried to go down the stairs? He fell and suffered minor injuries.

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Difference between African children and a fat boy? nothing, they're always hungry.

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Skeletons neither have muscles nor brains to control any muscles and therefor cannot transport themselves across a road or any stretch of land for that matter.

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Why did anna stop wanting to build a snowman? Beacuse she died of cancer.

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A man came home one day, drunk and feeling horny. He proceeded to the bedroom where he found his wife just getting into bed in a lace bra and sexy underwear. This turned him on even more so he cuddled up to her and whispered seductivly in her ear before kissing her neck. His wife was not in the mood for sex so she shot him

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One man asked another man what his favorite sport was. The man replied: " My favorite sport is golf." "Golf requires no physical strength, therefore I do not count it as a sport." Said the man who asked the question.

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KCLTLMBAIMWSSHTCAWGAHW

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What's worse than being dead? Nothing.

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A Polish man walks into a bar and says, "Co za asy..."

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what did the woman say? 'duhhh, i don't have a penis durr durr' (By the way, I'm trying to be not misogynistic, please let me know if you find this misogynistic in any way)

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Have you heard any anti-jokes? ... Are you Jewish by chance?

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If Apple made a house, would it have Windows?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops