What does and elephant and me have in common. Everything, I am an elephant.

Friends are a lot like trees I just thought you should know.

So there's this big ass bronco right? It goes to a store and it asks Ben Roethlisberger "Do you know where I can find some girls to rape?" Ben Roethlsiberger says "In aisle 5" so the moose goes down to aisle 5 but there aint no girls!

name one pop artist who's better than Michael Jackson that's really hard. there's so many

among liedbtt is my Captcha code

Why don't Catholics allow people to wear condoms? Because they get stuck in the alter boys braces.

What did the two best friends do before the asteroid hit the Earth? They hugged each other goodbye.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his village has been ravaged by small pox.

what's worse than finding an worm in your apple? Finding HALF a worm in your apple.

Ask me if I'mm a candy cane. Shutup, there are a lot of these types of jokes. Create your own you poophead.

What happened when Tim's house caught on fire? The fire department was contacted and they put the fire out.

I man sees a shooting star and makes a wish. Nothing happens as shooting stars are incapable of granting wishes.

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? One is a structure used to support sitting people, the other is a human being native to Mexico.

What do Elephants never forget? 9/11

q. What's the worst thing about your family a. There related to you

How many ants are in the kitchen? None. We killed them all.

What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walked into a prison. A gang stopped them, and said: Hey, want to play a game? Before they could run away, the gang leader told them the rules. You go over there and stand by the wall. You close your eyes, and then we fire a shotgun in your direction. The last one alive wins. They push the brunette onto the wall. She closes her eyes because she knows she's about to die and doesn't want her friends to see her crying. The gun goes off, and she falls to the ground, dead. They pull away her dead body. They decide it's the redhead's turn next. They move her onto the wall. Being the brightest one in the bunch, she tries to keep her eyes open. However, she blinks. The gun goes off, and she falls to the ground, dead. They pull away her dead body. Then the blonde bursts out laughing. "Your friends are dead. And you're about to die. Do you find that funny?" They ask. She answers. "No. It's just- I won the game!"

Wife: Does this make me look fat? Husband: Honey, your already fat.

I have a friend named David. He then lost his ID, now we called him Dav

What does the Post Office have in common with a shoe store? Both provide goods and services in exchange for money.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?"

Wanna here a joke? Dylan Shipleys penis!!!

Why did the person write an antijoke? To get to the other side

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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