What is the connection between a blonde and a halogen headlamp? There is none, one is a female human being with blonde hair and the other is a headlamp with a halogen lightbulb.

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Why was the boy at the funeral? Because he was dead.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing 'cause you done told the b i t c h twice!

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thats the same sound ur mom made in bed last night

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Sir, do you know what time it is? Yes, it is 5:15 PM

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Why was the dog sweating? It was locked in a car on a hot day.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it was tired of the people on the side she was on who told lame anti jokes, so she tried to stay away from them.

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1 111111 1 1 11111111111 1 1 111111 1

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A man was walking through the woods when he comes across a little girl crying by a lake. "What is the matter little girl?" he asked. "My cat fell in the lake ... and it couldn't swim ... so my father jumped in as well and drowned too," she cried," Sad, the man sighed, pulled down his pants and said, "Well I guess today's just not your day,"

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Osama bin Laden walks into a bar. Just joking, he's dead.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

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Q: What did the bus driver say to the black man? A: Nothing, he simply greeted him with a nod, as he would do to any other person who chose to ride the bus.

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Brenda said she found a pill to stop the effects of aging! It was a cyanide pill, Brenda is dead.

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What did the bartender say to the fat guy? Hi

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Roses are grey Violets are grey Im a dog

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What do a Nazi and a Democrat have in common? They are both members of a highly supported political faction.

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How to you stop the world from ending? You dont the world has been destroyed 5 times over again before and it will most likely happen to us one day.

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Why did the man jump off the cliff? Because he suffered from chronic depression as a result of frequent drug abuse.

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor

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Q. Why did Sally fall off the swing? A. Because she had no arms Q. What smells like red paint and is blue? A. Blue Paint Knock Knock? Who's There NOT SALLY

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why did the man have a hole in his face? because syphillis had eaten a hole in it

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YO MAMMA SO SKINNY SHE HULA-HOOP THIER A CHEERIO

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How many cavemen does it take to change a lightbulb? A caveman wouldn't know what to do with a lightbulb.

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your mommas so stupid she has trouble doing things an average person would manage easily

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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