Three men walk into a bar, one ducks and two fall down. What happened? They walked into a metal bar, like a sideways flagpole!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

HEYEEYAHEYAYYAEEAHHAAA

thumb_up thumb_down -22

whats does a dog cat spider and rat have in common?the dog cat and rat are all mammals.Exept for the rat idiot!!you should have figured THAT out before!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Don't count your eggs before you put them in a basket.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A man walks into a bar... He has a severe drinking problem, and his wife weeps for him

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the leper say to the prostitute? "How much?! No thanks, I think I'll shop around."

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's the worst part about anti jokes? They get boring after a while

thumb_up thumb_down -22

why did the black guy buy magnum condoms? because his white friend knew the cashier and thought it would be awkward for himself to buy them.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's the difference between Miley Cyrus and a dead baby? One is a popular singer and the other is a dead baby.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What happens when an alien touches fire? It gets burnt

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the Hispanic man have drugs in his pocket? He had just gone to the pharmacy.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

theres no 'I' in 'team' but theres an 'I' in 'hitler'

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the plane crash? Because the engine wasnt working.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How do you tell a clown his fly is open? Say sir your fly is open. Then beat him with a pipe until you cant tell what used to be his face.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did one volcano say to the other? Nothing. Volcanoes are inanimate objects that do not possess the ability to speak.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't become rotisserie with a side of hash brown.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A woman asked a man in an elevator, "Did you fart?" The man honestly replied, "Yes. I didn't expect you to notice because it was the puffy kind."

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What you do you call a gay man with no arms and legs? His name.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Ok so there were 2 white dudes telling black jokes...so one of the white dudes tells a joke to the other... 1st dude: what's brown and tall? 2nd dude: a tree 1st dude: no that scary black man who looks like he wants to beat us up.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

My captcha thing says "hulk smash" lol bahahahahahahaha, k

thumb_up thumb_down -24

This girl came up to me and said she recognized me from the vegetarian club. Her name was Jill.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Lady gaga suposedly has a wener.What does that make her? A man

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops