Do not lose hope, you have always considered me hard to get, while this time, I came to you. Next time too, I kinda owe you.

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Why couldn't Horton hear a who? He was a loaf of bread.

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What did the man say to the woman giving him a blowjob? That feels good.

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im passing this on from a friend: 2 blondes walk into a building, you think one woulda saw it,

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golf is so gay i mean look at what they name the different clubs 3 wood 4 wood 5 wood 6 wood just give it a beat and you got a catchy song

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A very rich man had a daughter whom all of the men in town wanted to marry her for wealth. Except there was one man who wanted to marry her due to his love for her. The father let his daughter marry whomever she wanted from all of the men in town, and she chose a man named Wilson Fremblington who wanted to marry her for wealth, because he was physically fit and overall a friendly man.

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Why did the man jump into the river? He wanted to go for a swim, but the pool was closed, so he swam in the river.

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A Priest, a Rabbi and a Shaman walk into a bar. The Bartender looks at them and says "What is this a Joke?"

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender asks what he'd like. The man says something funny, but you kinda had to be there.

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want to get screwed for four years? VOTE REFUGLYCAN!

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Yo mama is so old, she might die soon! - Louis

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and a corvette? I didn't get 20 years for owning a corvette.

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What did the fish say after he swam into a wall? Dam

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Why did the blonde cross the road? To get to the Public University where she worked as a Ph.D associate professor of linguistics.

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3 guys walks into a park. Which one was holding the beer? None, all 3 guys were elementary kids

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Did you hear about the sea cow who sang "Part of your Herd?" It was the Little Moomaid.

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What's a Mexican's favourite sport? Cross-country running.

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A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says, "We don't serve food here." The sandwich charges the barman for discrimination.

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"I saw daddy with mommy last night. I think he was stealing my milk."

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Some people just need a high five. In the face. With a gun.

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What's grey and can't climb trees? A parking lot.

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i had a dream last night;) it was sad because you lived but then i dreamed up a bus and made it hit you. i had a dream last night;) you died

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How do you find out a chinese's name? Ask him/her

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What's the difference between katchup and musterd A very long list of things that I don't want to read

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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