What do you get when you combine a baby and a chainsaw? 30 years to to life in prison.

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A guy walks into a doughnut shop and says "I'll have a small coffee and a doughnut." The shop keeper says, "I'm sorry we ran out of coffee." The guy says, "All right I'll just have coffee than"

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I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? How would she know? shes blind, deaf and mute; and incapable of knowing what she received.

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what do you call a mexican whos lost his car? nothing, nick ate him

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i wonder who made this website? a human

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why did jenny drop her ice cream? she got hit by a bus. knock knock who's there? not jenny.

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Why does Santa Clause say Ho Ho Ho? He has Tuberculosis.

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A man was late for work, he came to a stop for his third red light. He stopped and waited for the red light to turn green then continued on his way to work.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It lost it's grip on the branch and was unable to break it's fall before reaching the ground.

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Q. bob had 93 chocolate bars and ate 74 what does he have now? A. diabetes

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Why shouldn't you hit a black guy on a bike? Because you would get charged with vehicular manslaughter and have the NAACP all up in your ass.

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What do you call a Mexican flying a plane? A pilot

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What do you call a black man approaching your car in uniform whose name happens to be Darius? Officer Darius.

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How many policemen does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they just beat up the room for being black

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What's big, white, and red all over? A refrigerator that happened to fall on a small child.

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How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

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are you from Tennessee, cause i wanna rip out your throat you piece of dirt

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I am paralyzed from the neck down.

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Q: What's big, black, and smelly? A: The unemployment line.

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Why did the father leave work early on his son's birthday? He was rushed to the hospital after facing a severe heart attack due to a history of cardiovascular disease in his family.

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That's illegal What? Your mom

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How do you say hooker in Chinese? ?

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I hate it when I press submit, and I forgot to finish the jo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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