That awkward moment when a sentence doesn't end the way you think it octopus.

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How does God choose who goes to heaven? I'm just kidding, there's no God.

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An SQL query walks into a bar, sees two tables and asks if it can join them.

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Knock knock! Knock knock!! Knock knock!!! Knock knock!!!! WHOSE THERE! Wait its a woodpecker

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what do you call a bunch of black people in a pool cocoa puffs

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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Q: Whats the difference between a Jew and a Boy-scout A: Boy-scouts come back from camp

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What's worse than getting a bruise? AIDS.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7.? Well 7 has suffered a tramatic brain injury, and has a tendancy to brutally attack anyone he comes in contact with. The whole situation is unfortunate.

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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Why can't Roger drive a tractor? Because Roger is a goldfish

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Its a bird!! Its a plane!! No, its a bird.

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I've never seen a zebra use that crossing.

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What's black and white and red all over and can't go through a revolving door? A nun with a spear stuck in her head.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cøck in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

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if u read this u r bent A. Now your bent

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Homosexualism is so gay man

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What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? 45 pounds. My girlfriend was a fatass. Wasn't gonna make that mistake again when I found a woman to marry.

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? One is a devotee of the torah, one is a delicious meal.

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cop arrests a jew and interrogates him Jew. i aint telling you nothing cop: really cop pours a bag of coins on the table jew: thats about $7.80 cop: you can have it if you tell us what we want to know jew: ok jew: i stole the money 123

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Why was the boy mentally retarded? Because his mother was a tree

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I have two coins in my hand that add up to 30 cents, and one of them is not a nickel. I accidentally dropped them.

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Why Is Helen Keller such a bad driver? Because she is a woman

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple?  Getting raped by a 10 foot scorpion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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