Why did dave not hug his wife? becuase he said she looked horrifying from the war in iraq.

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Its Eliza, hope you are still there, would you mind getting here sooner? This site is not safe, besides its cold here, I mean send somebody else if you got to, I might look frail but Nero taught me a thing or two, so I can honestly say that Nero taught me better than you guys just in case. Funny you say there is no code, yet add three, yeah you better expect nothing "fancy", Mr.Torture dungeon master. Honestly though I do not blame you, and if I really meant you where a psycho, I would not have agreed/asked you showed up, I am serious I need to get out of here.

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how many dead babies can you fit into a bath tub i dont know i didnt get the chance to fill it up yet

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Roses are blue Colton is gay

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Why is the spine-tailed swift is the fastest bird? Because its faster than the second fastest bird

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Why wasn't the woman happy when she gave birth? Because she was thrown into a pool of semen 9 months ago.

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I'm pretty sure this site has been taken over by 12 year olds... None of these are funny

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What did the boy do with his ice cream? He ate it.

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A seal walks into a club.

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what did the man say to his horse? sex. -teagan doherty

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Suzie has no arms. Knock Knock (whos there?) Not Suzie.

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What's funnier than a Laffy Taffy joke? Almost anything.

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Whats long hard and full of semen? A dick.

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What do you call a really old black person? Someone's grandfather

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Did you hear the joke about the deaf kid? He didn't either.

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what did obama say when he lost his dog ? where the hell is my presidential dog !

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Man 1- What's red, black, and white all over? Man 2- What? Man 1- Half a penguin! Man 2 became seriously disturbed from this joke, as he saw the movie Happy Feet two days ago. He went to intense therapy and became mentally deranged.

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why can't hellen keller drive? Because she is visually impared and there for it would not be safe for her to drive

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A mass murderer ran into a bar full of people. He first shot a man. What did the man say when the murderer shot him? Nothing, he was hit in the head and instantly died before he could say anything.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? If you look closely, it's not a chicken, it's a man wearing a costume. He's going to a halloween party with some friends. Sally was not invited.

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What do you call a child that has been stabbed? A dead child

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What's purple, green, and orange? Dead baby with slashed floaties. What's black, purple, and orange? Same baby two weeks later.

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what has two lags and red all over? :a cat in a chinies restrunt...

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Do you know what killed the cat? Feline AIDS

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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