Why was the girl called stupid? She is mentally retarded...

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A man rode into town on Friday and came out on Friday how did he manage this? He stayed for a couple of hours

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If a bunch of midgets do the wave, is it a ripple ?

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What did the math teacher get after he ate and he ate? A full stomach.

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Whats worse than a joke? This

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/\ The joke above was really dumb. \/ The joke below is pretty good.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's blind and deaf, any situation with her in the drivers seat of a car would have serious implications.

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What is stupid, black and high? A stupid black kite.

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Eeny meeny miny mo, Catch a tiger by it's toe, If he hollers let him go, Because if you don't he would attack you and go straight for you're neck and you would die a painful death...

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What's fat and round and has a ballsack nose? Mr Chicken

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yo mama's so fat, yo mama's so ugly; your mothers breasts sag with such severity that the late great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am schizophrenic ...and so am I

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Q what do you do when your friend tells you hes a homosexual A. you tell him that you will accept him and can still be very good friends

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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Person 1: I'm really sleepy. Person 2: Then go to sleep.

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What's the hardest part of walking through a pile of dead babies? My penis.

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Why did the chicken cross the road. He didn't, this joke gets old really fast

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Malcolm Johnson from Zenith windows, I was wondering if I could speak to you for a while about some fantastic offers which we currently have on double glazed windows....

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Obama

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Sorry we dont serve time travlers here. A man walks into a bar.

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How can you tell if your wife is dead? She won't have a pulse.

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A baby crawls into a bar. He cannot walk.

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what is worse finding a worm in your apple? Finding a grub in your apple.

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How to kill a mocking bird? Stab it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops