- Anti Joke

A tall German man and a short Ukrainian woman walk into a pub and sit down for a drink. The German, not wanting to seem rude, asks the Ukrainian how her day has been. The Ukrainian smiles confusedly as she doesn't understand German.

What's green, has six legs and would kill you if it fell on you out of a tree? A pool table.

what did the blond do when her house was on fire? she called the fire department, because that would be the correct thing to do in such a situation.

Q: What Did Batman Say To Robin Before He Got In The Car? A: Get In The Car

A man walks into a bar... And orders a glass of beer to cool himself off after a long day at the quarry.

why are there so many homeless asians with squinty eyes, they cant find their way back home

Life's like a box of chocolates it's shit if you have diabetes

What does a shortstop do when the ball is by third base? He leaves the field to go to the hospital, his little sister just had a heart attack.

how many licks did it take the boy to get to the center of a tootsie pop? he died of cancer

Roses are red, Violets are blue Poems don't have to rhyme

What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam.

What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer

A black man, a small child, and a priest were all standing in line. They were all checking in the hospital after being in a 3 car pileup

Why is Andrew sleeping? Because he took and overdose on sleeping pills, he probably died in his sleep.

I went out back to bury my hoe.. with a hoe..

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What do elves get for Christmas? Overtime.

Knock knock. Who's there? Stop fucking around I told you I was coming. I'm sorry. Come in.

Deja moo: The feeling you've heard this bull before.

What's the difference between being hungry and being horny? Where you put the cucumber

Do you know what really hurts my feelings? Nerve damage.

cccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccorn

What did the suicide bomber say to the other suicide bomber? You're da bomb!