what happened to the girl next door ? she was brutally murdered.

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What do you call a black man driving a nice luxury sedan? A man who has, surprisingly, done very well in this economy.

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Why was the camel sad he wasnt, camels dont have feelings

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for his birthday? A bike

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What did nearly headless nick say when he became headless nick. Nothing because he doesnt have a head

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Q: What's blue and yellow all over? A: A baby at the bottom of the pool with a slashed floatie. Q: What's red and yellow all over? A: A floatie at the top of a pool with a slashed baby.

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It's okay, I got the yogurt.

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A cat starts grooming itself How many sprinkles does it take to cover the moon Cabinet because whales live in water

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How many women does it take to ski across the pit of lava? None, they would burn and die.

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Face...tastes like chicken!

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A wife says to her husband "Everybody's coming over tonight, I want you to dress nice." *logically this cannot happen because there is no way that this couples residence can fit all 6 or so billion people in the world, nor would they want to.

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Q: Wgat do you call a black man's dead bodie? A: A corpse.

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Two drunk drivers got in a car crash They both died

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What did the duck say to the pickle? Quack

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How does a boy with no arms or legs cross the street? He doesn't

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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A guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for some water. The bartender replies: "Sorry, we don't have any." The man responds: "Sorry, I'm drunk." He walks out.

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Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

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Why was the Japanese man unable to see? Because it was extremely sunny outside and he had forgotten to wear sunglasses.

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Why didn't the Alzheimers patient put on her shoes? She didn't leave the elderly home that day, thus taking away the need to put on shoes.

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what is chuck norris's favorite food? lasagna.

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A German challenged an Englishman to a duel But their neigbours found out and alerted the police

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:D STORY TIME! :D ... :D So once upon a time there was a... :) Uhm... :\ I forgot... Sorry :(

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What did the boy find I'n his water? Ice

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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