Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why do dogs walk across the street? Cause they can

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's worse than being named SAID? Having AIDS.. And getting a bee sting - it hurts like ****!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

why did the chicken eat chicken noodle soup? Because he killed his brother.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's red and a cow? Red cow

thumb_up thumb_down +11

There once was a man from Nantucket, who had his car stolen and wasn't very happy so called the police.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's the difference between Rick Perry and a toaster? One is a republican presidential candidate, while the other is an electrical appliance.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's worse the a bee sting? Two bees stings What's worse the two bee stings? The Holocaust What's worse the. The Holocaust? Three bee stings

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why didn't Johnny ride his bike to school today? Because it is Saturday

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Whats the difference between cats and dogs? ....cats suck

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's the difference between a gay and a homo?...........WTF I DON'T KNOW!?!?!?!?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what do you call a blonde who can't drive? a poor driver

thumb_up thumb_down +11

No antijoke here.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Your momma is so fat that she could benefit from loosing a couple of pounds.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Bible Fact0idz: "Something Drink my blood and consume my flesh and live forever something" Jesus- dead age 30something alcoholism liver problems and diabeetus at time of death, crucified and not been seen since, return pending? Classified Alcoholic. Moral: "YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!"

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you get when you mix hydrochloric acid and a humans digestive track? Death.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q) What did the Irishman get for his birthday? A) Drunk

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call a black priest? Holy shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

all the kids had fun

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, Or so the tell me, Because I'm Blind

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's worse than dropping you're ice cream? Getting your face mauled off by a German Shepard.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's the difference between a Pimple and a Priest? One waits till you're 13 to "cum" on your face.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How do you silence Justin Bieber? Hold his head under water until he stops struggling.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How many dead babies does it take to change a lightbulb? None they're dead

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops