How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one, but he may forget to finish the task due to his Alzheimer's.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange ya glad i didn't say banana

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Roses are gay, Violets are gay, I am gay.

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Why was the camel sad he wasnt, camels dont have feelings

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What do you call a remote that does not work? a remote that does not work.

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what did the computer say to the tv? computers are not living there for they cannot talk

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Knock Knock Who's There Lettuce Lettuce who? Lettuce down the street building his new garage

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Simon: Knock Knock Alfredo: Who's there? Simon: Wire Alfredo: Wire Who SImon? Simon: Wire are you asking me this!!!!

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A man walks into a bar with an octopus. He tells the bartender that his octopus can play any instrument. The bartender gives the octopus bag pipes. The octopus fiddles with the bag pipes but can't seem to play them. The man gives the bag pipes back to the bartender and leaves with his octopus. He is quite embarassed and decided to get bagpipe lessons for his octopus.

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How do you make your mom mad? Burn down the house and eat the dog.

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Do you know why one side of the V formation that geese fly in is longer than the other? Because there's more geese on that side.

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Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because its owner was neglecting him and the kitten later died of malnurisment

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Roses are red. Violets are grey. People hate me. Mongoose.

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why did every one care when i killed my self they didn't

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? He has retinopathy of prematurity and was born blind.

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What's worse than finding a work in your apple? The Holocaust.

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horses are burgers now ive got the flu watch out tescos because im gonna sue

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how do you make Will Smith cry? cut off his toes and fingers.

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Why did the black man walk across the road? just kidding he didnt make it across the road i hit him with my car

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Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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why did the black go to the KFC because he likes fried chicken

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Q. How can you tell if your arm is broken? A. Break it.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Boo Boo Who? Boo Smith

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Why was billy sad? He was being brutally hacked to peices behind his garage

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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