Roses are red, Violets are violet, If you think Violets are blue you're an idiot because they're called violets for a reason.

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Q: What do you call four black guys hanging in a barn? A: Farm tools

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple ? Finding an apple in your worm !!! ... Wait, what ?

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What are the two words that once you hear, You will feel a sudden gush of euphoria followed by immense depression? The Game

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Q: What's 1 + 1? A: I don't know, I am an African who was bought up in the famine my mother died, my father starved. I have to sell myself to feed my sisters. I never went to school and drink my urine every second day because I have no water.

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A man recently set the world record for jumping into a foot of water from 50 feet high. Luckily, this made the clean-up rather simple.

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What is the difference between a pizza and ten dead babies? I dont have a pizza in my oven.

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A teacher, a consturction worker, and an army general are on an airplane. The pilot tells them the plane has too much weight, and if they don't each drop one item then the plane will crash. Realizing one item each is obviously not enough weight to throw off, the teacher and the construction worker team up and throw the army genral off the plane. They land safely, and live the rest of their life haunted by their vile actions.

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What do you call a secret agent that lives in a bottle of washing up liquid? Bubble-0-7

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What did the rich white student to the poor arabian teacher? good morning Mr.Stevenson.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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Two fish are in a tank. One asks the other, "How do you drive this thing?"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was hit by a bus.

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What do you call a black man on a bike? A hard-working individual who found a steady job and earned enough money to buy a bicycle of his own which he rides to and from his job because he is healthy, doesn't like to waste money on gas, and doesn't like the pollution automobiles put into the air. By Darragh Hamilton

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Ask me what my name is. What's your name. My name is Jeff.

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What's more greasy than grease? Kevin's hair

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Two construction workers are working on the final floor of what will soon be the worlds tallest building. The first turns to the other and says: "Hey tom can you throw me a three quarters hex wrench? i think my set is metric." the second guy turns around and says: "yea, here you go."

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27

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What color is a red house Red What color is a blue house Blue What color is a white house White What color is a green house Clear

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Why can't Michael Jackson swim? Because he is dead.

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How do you make something disappear from your hand? Throw it somewhere that's out of sight,

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy, but heres my gamertag so party up maybe?

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Q:Whats worse then hard nipples A:The holocaust

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What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Nothing. She isn't supposed to chat because it's study hall and they enforce a strict "no talking" policy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops