How do you fit an elephant into a car? You can't. Unless it's a baby elephant. You would probably also need a convertible with the top down.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why is the chicken dead? It tried to cross the road.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

............................................................................................................ . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .. . . . . . .. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .thumbs up!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the doctor say to the obese person? You have diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

2 * 2 * 2 * 3 * 2417

thumb_up thumb_down +6

I told my two lesbian friends I wanted to join them. I am a priest in a Gay Marriage friendly state and they are happily married.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a black person on a bike? A cyclist.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock-knock jokes with sjws: Knock knock! Who's there? A transgender! A transgender who? WOW. It's 2016, people. If you can't recognize a transgender, you're a disgusting piece of cis white male scum! OH! OHH! "I'm sorry lady"? Do I LOOK like a lady to you? I'm a- no- sir- stop interrupting me. SIR! I identify as a gender fluid demisexual! "What does that matter?" Oh my god. Well it wouldn't matter if I identified as a goddamn piece of salami to you would it??? Huh? I'm confusing you? WOW! What a priveleged- oh! So I'M being rude? OKAY! FINE! I'm recording this you know. You're going ALL over the Internet. Oh yes you are! No, hey, my privilege cam! You just took it this is rape! You are assaulting me! Don't just shove it back into my hands like that! I call patriarchy! Oh no, I'm not done with you! Don't you close that door you Goddamn piece of sh- *slam*

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M Factory Because she repeatedly wrote Ws

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's the difference between Jesus and a painting? It only takes one nail to hang up a painting.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

I like my women how i like my coffee. Without a penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

last night i was doing some guy in the ass. i went to give him a reach around and the homo had a boner! freakin queer.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

how do you kill a baby? introduce it to alice cooper

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man walked into a bar making it immediately apparent that he had no future in competitive limbo.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What is the difference between a duck? None! One of their legs are both the same.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

how do you get expelled? Rape a special ed kid.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

-What do you say to a woman with Two Black eyes?. -Are you really that dumb to leave the kitchen twice -Elder High School

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What is the difference between a brick and a ginger? The entirety of their chemical make up and physical appearance.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why do birds suddenly appear? Because they can fly

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A person from Singapore eats

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's a Gingers favorite drink? Coke!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what happened when joey asked the teacher to go to the restroom? The Teacher said "yes you may go to the restroom," not even putting into consideration that joey was a ginger and discriminating him because of it.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

a person who will soon die of beeties

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops