Q: Why couldn' the muslim eat pork? A: Because he had been raped and killed by a giant scorpion.

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osama bin laden is dead

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There were two chippendales in a bar - what were their nicknames? Chip and Dale

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What did the apple say to the Banana? ....Nothing... fruit don't talk

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Why's it so bad to be black and Jewish? You have to sit in the back of the oven.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Cars were invented after her death, so she never had the opportunity to learn.

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How do you suppress a black hole? Surround it with white holes

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What do you get when you cross a spider with a cow? A dead spider.

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Why did the chicken successfully cross the road? It didn't in the middle of the street it got hit by a car.

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so your paddling up stream in a cement canoe, one wheel falls off. how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 46 cause bears dont like eggs.

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What's brown and has four wheels? Wood, I lied about the wheels.

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What do you call a black doctor? Doctor.

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What's worse than being a replacement? An insufficient replacement.

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Why couldn't Stephen Hawking run a marathon? He was struck by a very serious disease, otherwise known as refrigerator to the face, at the age of 5.

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whats an aids victims last wish not to have aids

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What is colored and looks good hanging from trees? Oranges. Get your mind out of the gutter!

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had down-syndrome

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a Dyslexic, Agnostic, Insomniac stayed up all night, wondering if there really was a dog.

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Why was Jimmy sad? Because he was about to be shot for attempting to assassinate the president.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Remember when Jesse Ziegenbein was skinny?

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Why did the little boy fall down the tree? He didn't. He jumped.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm in it? Biting into a worm and finding an apple in it.

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Why is Joel even here? Sexperience.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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