What made the old man laugh? A pile of dead babies.

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Yo mama so fat she has more chins than the Chinese phone book. A.V.T was here Fred.

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Whats the difference between a Corvette and 1000 dead babies? I don't have a Corvette in my garage.

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Why did the guy get glasses? So he could get his dick into the vagina.

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Why did the chicken cross the road!? He was supposed to be dead! You are by far the most incompetent chicken assassin we've ever had. You're fired.

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There are two types of people in this world, those that can extrapolate from incomplete data

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Q: Did you hear the joke about Helen Keller? A: Neither did she...

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Gordon Brown smiles.

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Why Did The Boy Fall Off The Swing? Because He Had No Arms.

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~Roses Are Red~ ~Violets Are Blue~ ~I Am Straight~ ~Not Sure About You~ ~Tell us?~

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What does a man want more than sex? Nothing.

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A man and his wife go out to dinner, after dinner they return home safely and the man kisses his wife good night. He then leaves his house, and goes to a bar with another women. He is a polygamast and it is socially acceptable in his town.

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Knock Knock Come in

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What's the difference between an orange? Two typewriters, because vests don't have sleeves.

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What did the little boy get on christmas morning? Cancer.

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Dear Jim, I have a problem with my Hymen... "Jim'll fix it for you..."

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What is black and bad for your teeth? A cannon ball

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Why is it okay to have four cats? Because I said so.

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Why did Jack take a prune out for the evening? A healthy snack as part of a balanced diet.

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Knock knock ? Who's there ? Ipe Ipe who ? You sick !

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Feel free to call me, forget the money, as for my fucking eye, I just sure as hell hope those responsible are rotting in prison. I mean I just lost an eye right? Just kidding, I am the one who has been dead wrong here, I judged you wrong, I am the fuck that seems to feel responsible for the actions of others at times, then again I thought that you where sending them against me, they surely claimed they where, but fuck, people use all sorts of things and people as an excuse to do whatever the hell they want.

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How did the black guy, get a nice car, house, and attire? He went to college, and got a job.

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Whats bigger than a tree A bigger tree

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Why the monkey fall out the tree? Cause he was dead!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops