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Want to hear a joke? So do I.

A seven foot tall kindergartener walks into a bar. He is reduced to tears after being ridiculed for his inordinate height and unappealing physical appearance. A bartender then proceeds to escort him out of the bar for being underaged. -BG_Shank_A

Parents are very similar to trees. They fall over when hit repeatedly with an ax.

How much is that doggie in the window? $4.95 + Shipping&Handling

I once met a man named Steve. I said, "Hello."

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had celebral palsy.

How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at its face.

Abortion.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face" The horse responds "My daughter has cancer"

So this moose walks into the super-market and asks the lady woman at he counter "Got any potatoes?" Lady woman says "Down Isle 5" So the moose goes down isle 5 and there isn't any potatoes

periods are red waffles are blue your mum's a milf I sucked her boob

Why did Mary fall off the swings? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock, Whos there, Not Mary

Simba was moving slow,so I told him to MUFASA!!!

Why did the white boy not make his high school basketball team? Because he was not as good as the other players.

Roses are grey Violets are grey Colorblindness isn't funny And neither are you

Why did Sandra fall of the swing? She had no arms... Knock Knock Who is there? Not Sandra

Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews undergo metabolism, maintain homeostasis, possess a capacity to grow, respond to stimuli, reproduce and, through natural selection, adapt to their environment in successive generations. More complex living organisms can communicate through various means.[1][5] A diverse array of living organisms (life forms) can be found in the biosphere on Earth, and the properties common to these organisms—plants, animals, fungi, protists, archaea, and bacteria—are a carbon- and water-based cellular form with complex organization and heritable genetic information. Pizza does not.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody knows, it's impossible to determine the motivations of an animal that is incapable of speech.

knock knock who's there? F uck F uck who? F uck off

Person 1: Ask me if i'm a tree. Person 2: Are you a tree? Person 1: No.

How did the little boy get down from the top of the empire state building... He took the elevator

When time is the best time to make a wish during the day? 9:11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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