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What do you get when you jump into the Red Sea? Wet.

What does an elephant and a plum have in common? They are both purple... except for the elephant

What's worse than hitting your thumb with a hammer? Getting your spine ripped off

My girlfriend is getting an abortion tonight. Its a surprise.

Three men are facing a firing squad. They are all promptly executed. Even if they were to escape by distracting the executioners, they would no doubt be shot down before they could get for.

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick

Why is Justin Bieber gay? Justin is attracted to the female gender

Why did George shaw fall off the swin?. Because he got a bowl thrown at his head

Why is the black guy afraid of the white guy? He's not, it's the other way around.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse begins bucking wildly, injuring three patrons before breaking through the front door.

It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

What's flaming and has wheels? A firepit. I lied about the wheels.

If God gives you lemons you find a new God

Stop with the 9/11 jokes guys. They're just plane stupid.

whats the best joke ever? womens rights

Who kille the Mockingbird? George Bush: i wish i could know the answer for this question, but belive me i am thinking.

XD Jackass.

A: Knock, knock. B: Who's there? The writer of this joke had no idea how to end this.

What do you call black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist bastard

what did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? were both lawyer's.

Why did the little boy rush downstairs to the living room on Christmas morning? because he heard his mother screaming rape.

Knock Knock Who's there It's me open the door

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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