A chicken walks into a bar and orders a beer. He's not really a chicken, he's just called a chicken because he is always afraid.

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When is it ok to drink urine? When you're Bear Grills

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25.

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wow i bet grass is lucky on st patricks day. why? becuase its green all year. *smacks* ow. i kno. but hey im corn.

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Your mama's so fat, she cries daily and regularly questions her purpose in life.

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whats worse than god meaner than the devil. the poor have it the rich need it nothing

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What is hitlers favorite planet: jewpiter

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question: do zombies eat brains answer: actually zombies don't exist, so they don't eat anything

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he has no arms.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was deaf and blind.

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Whats black and can multitask? My IPod you racist!

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Whats similar about an elephant and a plum? Theyre both gray, except for the plum

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Take wrong turns

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? Still a pilot.

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What did the serial killer do when his check bounced? He promptly deposited more money into his account.

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A bus full of retarded kids got broken on his way. One kid suggested to the bus driver that the problem could be with the brakes, as that kid's father was a mechanic.

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How many black babies fit in a garbage can? It depends on the capacity of the garbage can.

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Why cant a black person read? Because there is nothing to read...

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Question: So, what do you get if you put a live dog, a dead cat, some sugarcubes, and your sisters panties (HORMONES OKAY? EVERYBODY KNOWS HORMONES EQUALS SPICE! Or something anyways...) In a blender until its all red and squishy? The hell I know, but put some Redbull in it, and its fucking delicious!

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Knock knock. Who isn't there? Not me. Don't come in. I won't.

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What did one sausage say to the other? Nothing. Sausages don't talk...

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Me: What day is it? Rebecca Black: Tuesday

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How many friendzoned guys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. They just compliment it then get mad when it won't screw.

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Colin is gay but toasters are not

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops