What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Whatever his parents named him

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Why did Billy drop his ice-cream? He got stabbed multiple times

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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whats in common with a rat and an apple? neither of them are a fridge

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Is it possible to mix an answer to a question with another? No. Aids are perfect for fear training.

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An old jew, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

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What do you get if you cross a nan and a car? A squashed dead nan who released their bowels and your grandads face who was also dead as they had a cardiac arrest

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A black man, a mexican, and a christain are on an island. There are also many other people on the island, since all of North America and South America is one giant land mass.

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Knock knock Come in

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Error 37.

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Whats red and smells like Bacon. Bacon

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Q: What's worse than seeing a scorpion A: being stung by that scorpion

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Your future.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends how hard you throw them.

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What did the screwdriver do when it was insulted? It got up and walked away.

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My mom is such a bitch that no one will date her!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!TRUE STORY!! :D

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam...

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When life gives you lemons, you're probably at Mr. Life's fruit stand over on Imperial Avenue.

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Why was the girl stupid? Because she had a low IQ

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Which square is small and yellow? The small, yellow square.

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Why isn't this a joke? Because it's not.

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Why are the new york knicks called the new york knicks.? no one gives a crap

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Why did Jane's parachute not open? Because a plane hit her on the way down.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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