There was a little boy in kindergarten who really had to go to the bathroom. So he asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom, and she told him he could go at snack time. The little boy really had to go to the bathroom, so he asked his teacher again, and like before, she told him to wait until it was snack time. The little boy had to go very very badly and asked the teacher one more time. This time the teacher said "if you can say the alphabet, then you can go to be bathroom" so the little boy got up all his courage and started off with "A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y and Z." Then the teacher said,"good job" and let him go to the bathroom. When he went there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy.

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Guy 1: I had a Energy Drink the other day, I crashed. Guy 2: Really? That must of sucked. Guy 1: Yeah, the family in the other car died.

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Nohypocondrism: When you feel fine and everyone keeps telling you you are a sick bastard. Charisma: Hey, that guy that changed my life killed the neighbor, cool rite? I mean that damn neighbor did say nothing to me when I said hi. Solitude: When the room is so overcrowded that you feel small and alone. I think that people that are jack of all trades and master of none are stupid... I AM JACK OF NO TRADES AND MASTER OF ALL! I am nothing, because nothing lives on forever, nothing is unbreakable, nothing is really awesome on a terrible day... I am also Nobody, because Nobody has more money than me.. FUUUUUUUU..

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The anti joke that repeats itself :(

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Why did the squirl eat the accorn? Because he enjoys it.

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If an illegal immigrant fought a child molester, is it Alien vs. Predator?

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Why did the beaver cross the road? To meet Justin Bieber!

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wots brown and smells like shite shite

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Why does Owen Wilson have an ugly nose? Because of his refusal to get plastic surgery.

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I hate black people. Because their black.

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A creationist, an evolutionist, and Neanderthal Man walk into a bar. They order two beers and a glass of red wine. The bartender asks: "Will that be all?". The evolutionist says "Yes"

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Why did sam and jolanda drop their pudding? They got hit by a flying tree.

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my uncle tommy is super religious. last month he's walking down the street, he gets mugged and shot in the chest. now miraculously (and i mean miraculously), he always keeps a bible in his left chest pocket. and he had something to read as he bled to death.

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How do you blind a Chinese man You put a blind fold on him

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why did suzy drop her ice cream? she got hit by a bus. knock knock. whos there? not suzy.

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What's the difference between a plum and bunny? They're both purple, except the bunny.

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There's a Korean Black person and a Mexican on a cliff who jumps first? Who Cares

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What do you tell someone who says they are contemplating suicide, Get over it

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guys cmon dont make fun about abbie make fun of josh brown WHAT A NOOB

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Q. Why did Michael Jackson call Boys II Men? A. He thought it was a home delivery service.

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whats red and spikey? an apple i lied about the spikes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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rebecca is a hard worker

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What is smelly and sticky A poo

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What do you have if you have a green ball in your right hand and a green ball in your left hand? Two green balls.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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