A man walks up to a woman in a bar. They hit it off. That night they make wild sex and fall madly in love with each other. They start dating, it's so fantastic. They understand each other on almost every emotional and intellectual level. They have the same humor and they love spending time together. The sex is so great. After a few years, they get married, and they start the rest of their lives together. They have 2 beautiful children and their lives are blossoming. Fast forward 30 years. They are both retired old people, yet still madly in love. They live in their old home, and their lives are very comfortable. Their children have grown up into adults, and are very happy. Fast forward another 10 years, and they now live in an elderly home. They are both in wheelchairs and their health is slowly deteriorating. They die.

Knock knock, Come in...

A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

There was a cat, an astronaut and a nun. The cat was sleeping, the astronaut was floating, and the nun was praying. There was a singer, a dancer and an actor. The singer was singing, the dancer was dancing, and the actor was acting.

a dinosaur with a large clown hat is walking down the street when he is confronted by an obese monkey human with red hair. I set this up for a good pun, but the one i have is potatoes.

How old is victor? Old

What did the autistic child say to the doctor? Nothing. His condition is so severe that he is mute and may never talk for the rest of his life.

im the real danny hamilton you stupid asshole

Why do black people eat so much fried chicken? Because it's delicious!

What do you call a guy and two girls are at the bottom of the ocean? A guy and two girls at the bottom of the ocean.

My mom gave me a quarter. I tryed to spend it on bubblegum but 7-11 said no...

So the docter saw the girl had a "M" on her chest during surgery. He asked her if he had a boyfreind from Michigan. She said "no, but i have a girlfreind from winsconsin, why do u ask?"rf

If you stretch all your skin out in a line, you will die of blood loss or possible infection

Joey mayer's face

you ever hear the joke about the rabbi, the pope and an elephant? No? well its a good one...

Why did the man rob a convenience store? Don't ask why, call the police! He could be robbing more stores!

Two buissness men had a meeting at 12:00 they had there meeting at 12:00 and left back to there normal life.

What's the difference between a cat and a dog? Dogs taste better in stews.

25

Why can't a black guy be the King of England? He's not in line for it.

Two men and a woman jump out of a plane. They forgot their parachutes and all died.

poop is very very yummy.

Knock Knock Who's there? its the police mam your son has been killed by a hit and run driver, the driver was an alcohol

Why did 12 people die when they went to see The Dark Knight Rises movie premiere? Because they were shot and bled profusely resulting in quick, painful death.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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