Joanna walks up to a random house, knocks on the door,"Is this where the party's at?!"

How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

How do you get a blonde to break a nail? Smash her finger with a wrench.

What did the baby say to its mother after breastfeeding? Nothing

Knock Knock Who's there? Jimmy Tyler, your son Hi son *continues to open door

what did the parapelegic (limbless) kid get for his birthday? Heart failure

what happens when a jew meets a black person answer: they greet one another

Why does snoop dogg carry around an umbrella?? ......fo drizzle

You wanna know the funniest joke ever? Justin bieber

Whats white and looks like a bunny? a rabbit

terry stockton is straight

what do you call a cow with no legs? ground beef

I'm banging your sister.

Roses are red Kittens are fluffy This doesn't rhyme Cupcake

Knock Knock Whos there? Jonny Jonny who? Jonny tsunami, hope you can swim Japan

Q: What dosent a Jew and a pizza have in commen? A: The pizza dosent scream when you put it in the oven.

A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I can't believe it," the man exclaims, "I've died and gone to Heaven! I-" St. Peter interrupts him. "Not quite yet, my son. You must first answer three questions. You will only enter Heaven if I deem you fit to do so." The man nervously agrees. "All right. First question," St. Peter says. "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." "Splendid," St. Peter responds. "Did you attend church every Sunday?" The man loses some of his former confidence. "I may have missed the odd week." "That's fine," says St. Peter. "One last question... Do you believe you are worthy of entering the Gates of Heaven?" The man answers nervously, "Well... yes, yes I do." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

What happened to boy who fell down the stairs? He died. What happened to the girl who fell down the same stairs? The boy who fell down the stairs hit her down the stairs too and they both died What happened to the man fell down these very same stairs? He got peer pressure and committed suicide.

A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released into a nearby park.

Why did your mom cross the road? She Tripped and started rolling

Whats brown and smells like shit? Shit.

What's green and gets people high? A green helicopter

vagina, hehehehehehehe

What did one muffin say to the other muffin Holy shit a talking muffin

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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