"You know what sucks?" "vaccuums?" "you know what meteforically sucks?" "Black holes?" "you what just isn't cool?" "Lava?"

A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "Only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

A muslim walks into a gay bar.

A mexican Police officer walks into a crime scene. "Ouch." he exclaims, rubbing his forehead where a red bump is already surfacing.

What's brown and sticky? 'Brown' is a colour, and 'sticky' is a consistency. Please try and use correct grammar.

Q: why are black people good at basketball? A: because they practice

Why did the dog run away from home? Because dogs are absent-minded and they don't know any better.

Why did suzy drop her popsicle? She was trampled by a homosexual moose.

whats your name? bumder:)

What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungie cord? My ass.

if life gives you lemons you probably have problems

What do you call a black man flying a plane. A pilot.

What time is the dentist appointment? Time for you to get a watch

What do you call a black person at a 7-11? A customer.

A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

hey what are you eating there? a giant scorpion that tried to rape me.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" So the horse says, "My ex-wife just got full custody of my kids and I'll never see them again."

How do you know that someone is polish ? They smell funny

DOWN

what do you call 6 black guys hung in a tree? a arazona wind chime

One time Chuck Norris cried. He felt slightly better after the experience, but, unfortunately, his grandmother still died of cancer.

I can't remember if I have Azheimer's or not.

So a catholic priest, a pedophile, and a rapist walk into a bar. He orders a beer.

how do you make a dead baby float? take your foot off its head.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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