An owl turns to the other owl. He has to, he can't move his eyes.

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What do you call someone with no legs? whatever their name is, physical appearance should have no bearing on someones title.

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Why did John fall off the tree? We were throwing rocks at him.

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I've got a shotgun with two bullets. I've got two enemies. What do I do with the gun? Go bird hunting.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

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Anti jokes gives me cold sores

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whats the best way to burn calories? Set a fat kid on fire.

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A guy and a girl look at a dog licking his crotch and the guy utters "damn I wish I could do that" The girl says: I can totally do that! "really? prove it" the guy says. The girl walks towards the dog and says "you just need to pet him so he don't bite you"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? As this question does not provide neccesary information, a plausible answer cannot be found.

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What do you call a black man who graduated med school? A doctor

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What do black people and apples have in common? Nothing.

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Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Answer: Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

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roses are green violets are red im shooting heroine into my head

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an amosh person used an electrical appliance

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas Mittens

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¸Knock Knock whos there Penis penis who your family has penis cancer

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if two couples walk down the street, when do they die? when a pack of rabid dogs eats them.

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How do you get a giraffe in a fridge? Open the Door, put the giraffe in, close the door How do you get an elephant in a fridge Open the door, take the giraffe out, put the elephant in, close the door There is an animal meeting, one animal doesn't show up. Which animal didn't come? The Elephant, it's still in the fridge You come across a crocodile infested river, how do you get across? You swim across, the crocodiles are at the meeting, Weren't you listening?

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Why couldn't the 1 year old talk? It's a 1 year old, idiot, it can't!

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knock knock

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what did the ruler say to the other ruler your a ruler

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was hit by a large refrigerator Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? The two of them were stapled together Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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I'd type a joke about dicks but it's too long.

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Mr. Burns sex scandal.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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