How many perverts does it take to screw a lightbulb?

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-Knock Knock -Whos there? -The police -OH SHIT

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A tree walks into a bar. But it is a dead tree so it actually didn't

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How do you kill a fly? Shoot it

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How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it. How do you make it stop crying? You throw another brick at it.

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Your mother is so fat that her doctor recommended that she exercise regularly and eat foods with nutritional value.

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What's funny about suicide? Nothing, that's horrible.

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A blind man walks into a bar....and a chair....and a table....and a wall....and a person... etc.

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What did the Sony guy say when he hit the golf ball? PS FOUR!

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ROSS G IS OBESE

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I don't often drink beer. But when I do, I recklessly beat my wife and kids.

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What's worse than nine dead babies hanging in a tree? One dead baby hanging in nine trees.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to a chicken

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Get in the car

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what is fat and ugly. fat and ugly people

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Chuck Norris died.

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Why doesn't Santa come in the Summer? Because it's not Christmas.

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Why did Hellen Keller get hit by a car? She didn't see it coming. (TD)

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There was a man who had a camel, but one day he lost his camel. He wanted to go and look for it but he couldnt because he had to go to work. So the next morning he went to look for his camel. He went over the road and saw a gate, but he couldnt through because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate and saw a forest, but he couldnt through because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest and saw a hill,but he couldnt go down the hill because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill and saw a river,but he couldnt go over the river because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river and saw a house, but he couldnt go to the house because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house and saw a door, but he couldnt knock on the door because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house, knocked on the door, and saw a man, but he couldnt speak to the man because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house, knocked on the door, saw a man, and asked the man, "have you seen my camel?", but the man couldnt respond because he had to go to work The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house, knocked on the door, saw a man, and asked the man, "have you seen my camel?", and the man said, "no"

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Hey Patrick Yeah? I found something funnier then 24 Give it to me buddy 25

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Why cant stevie wonder see? He is blind

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Q: How many cantaloupes can you fit into Jackie Chan's basement? A: 4

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Q: I am an over-protective father looking for my son who was kidnapped and am suddenly traveling with a mentally retarded woman who cant remember her name. By the way my wife was murdered and my son has physical disorder. Then, im hooked up with a hippy who doesnt care about anything. Who am I? A: Marlin the clownfish (from Finding Nemo).

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What do you call a group of black gentle men running down a hill A group of black gentle men running down a hill

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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