You want to hear a joke. Sure. A black president. Oh wait...

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Hey, I just met you And this is scabies So I'm prescribing you some permethrin.

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A rooster lays an egg on top of a henhouse. Which way does the egg fall? Roosters don't lay eggs.

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What did the hose say to the sprinkler? I'm gonna squirt you.

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what movie can a retarded 8 year old play the lead role in. Zathura

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did you hear about the dyslexic, overweight, wheelchair bound blind guy? No? Niether did I, I'm deaf so don't hear about anything.

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Cat ate a battery, did volts.

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What's big with fat all over it? Your mom on this dick

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A man goes to the potty.

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dalas rof rezilitref taerg a si citsalp. Read it from right to left.

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What's the best part of having sex with twenty-four year olds? There's 20 of them.

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steve walked into a bar, what happened next? A: He fell down.

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why don't asians use this finger (point at pinky)? because it's my finger.

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Did you hear about the kidnapping in New York? He woke up.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I tryed to hang myself But my neck qad to fat

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Why did Gina laugh? Because something was funny.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she was hit by a refrigerator.

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Brother: Where is my Guitar? Me: To the Left to The left Brother : No its not Me: Everything you own in the box to the to the left Brother : Im telling Mom Me: In the Closet Thats my stuff and if i bought please don't touch Brother: *Opens Closet* This is all Mine! Me: *Takes off headphones*? Huh? Brother: Nevermind - _ -

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What's harder than nailing a dead baby on a tree? My dick while doing it.

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What do you call five gay men walking in the same direction? I don't know the usual human does not take note of such circumstance.

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Why was the tree sad? Because a bird shat on it.

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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People really hate it when sentenses don't end the way elephants wear hats

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Why did the man commit suicide? He was depressed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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