What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? The pizza does not scream in the oven

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Whats black and runs really fast? Usain Bolt

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Why was the jewish boy crying? i lied he was happy.

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whats the difrence between santa clause and a jew santa goes down the chimney

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Your mother is so white that when she dances, she is off beat a little bit.

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What's better than getting second place in the paralympics? Having legs.

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A guy, arriving at the pearly gates of Heaven, asks St. Peter "Why did I die? Why me." St. Peter replies: "You died the same way everyone does. Lack of oxygen to the brain."

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what do you call a dog with no legs. It dosent matter it wont come

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What's worst then getting struck by lightening? your face.whats worse then seeing your face? NOTHING

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prison isnt fun it also is bland kidnapping is a crime but get in the van

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whats big, white and will kill someone if it falls out of a tree? a refridgerater

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why was the little girl crying? Because her family was dead

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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You: Did u hear the one about that guy walking into a bar? Them: No. You: He said it hurt

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Roses are red Violets are blue Roses are red Violets are blue Roses are red Violets are blue whilst you reading this I just raped you

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What's worse than putting stones in a blender? Putting a baby in a blender.

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Why can't Osama bin Laden make anymore terrorist attacks? He's dead.

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one morning i turned on my tv

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A Chinese man and an African man walk into a bar. Its good to see so much multiculturalism in a usually racist society.

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Yo mama's so fat, I gave her a compliment because we should embrace body acceptance.

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Two Pigs are in a bath. One pig says to the other "pass me the soap", to which the other pig replies "Do I look like a typewriter?"

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How do you treat lice Avoid getting them

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Q: What do you call a white man with 5 black men? A: A friendly white man. Q: What do you call a white man with a hundred black man? A: A tourist in Kenya.

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Why did the kid need glasses? A monkey threw a fridge at him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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