Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

What do you call a fly with no wings? Disabled

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

Knock Knock whos there? Semore Frickelson Semore Frickelson Who? What other Semore Frickelson do you know!? Let me in its freezing out here!

Why did Batman brush his teeth? So he wouldn't get bat breath

Knock Knock? Whos there? Not Madeleine McCann.

why cant the porcupine marry the balloon? ...neither one can talk.. obviously.

theres a taco and a blonde...who eats who? the blonde eats the taco.

Knock Knock. READ THE DAMN SIGN IT SAYS NO SOLICITORS!!! ... yeah.

KNOK KNOK WHOES THERE APPLE APPLE WHO SEE THIS IS Y U BROKE UP

'How do you make a plumber cry? Buy him a belt for Christmas.

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

A man shouts a women crossing the road "Oi, get your rat out love!" So she did, and it savaged his face.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Ebola, You're going to die.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? I hit her with a shovel.

Your mother is so fat that when she jumps into a pool, she displaces a proportionately larger amount of water than people with normal body mass indexes or BMI

what do 9 out of 10 people enjoy?............Gangrape

What did the woman say to her abusive husband? You're hurting me.

What used to be red, but isn't anymore? A scalped ginger.

there's a worm in my lime at least it doesn't have scurvy

How many dyslexic people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Filing cabinet.

What's the difference between a black person and cancer? If you don't know already, you should really question your countries education system and your parents upbringing.

What rhymes with milk...milf

What is hard, long, moist, and flesh colored? A hotdog you dirty, dirty bastard!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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