Q: Whats big, strong, black, and sexy? A: Your imaginary dick

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? An apple in your anti-joke

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I was having sex with my girlfriend the other night and she called me a pedofile. i told her that was a pretty big word for a 9 year old.

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Why is Travis so hilarious? ....Trick question hes not.

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why did the black man eat two buckets of fried chicken? because he was hungry and he likes fried chicken

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What do you get when you mix a crap with a fart and a slug? Urmom

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Chuck Norris can fly around the world in under 2 days. In an airplane.

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Do you want to hear a joke about dogs? A joke about dogs.

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Why do some RVs have 2 doors? Because 11 would be too many.

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why did the sock go to kroger cause he was laying on the couch

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What did the Hindenburg say? -nothing it just blew up

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how do you drown a blonde? chain her to a cinder block and throw her off a bridge.

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Want to know who gets head a lot? Balloons

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why did the man walk into the metal pole? because hes blind and suffers from cancer.

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Life is like a box of chocolates, It doesn't last too long for fat people.

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Women's rights.

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A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a pedophile.

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Why did Hitler go to the hospital? Because he shot and poisoned himself.

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One penguin says to another penguin, "It looks like you are wearing a tuxedo." The other penguin says, "Yea, I have to go to dinner party later."

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari? A dead baby causes years of grief and broken families

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police. We know about the cocaine.

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shoe and shoelace. one is meaningless without the other

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one doesn't

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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