Jesse gives his mom the stick for breakfast

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What happened to Grant when he did a cart wheel? Chuck had sex with Victoria

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the business man jump into a mud puddle? He didn't. He was brutally stabbed to death then thrown in a pigpen in an attempt to conceal the evidence.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A black person tans and starts to peel, what do you get? A white person.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what do you call a cat that cant meow? Charlie Sheen.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the dyslexic boy get for Christmas? A laptop. And he was very happy.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did one Japanese man say to the other? I don't know, I don't speak Japanese.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

It's all fun and games until you stop having fun

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why did everyone laugh at the kid in the wheel chair as he entered the room? he was poor

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Pineapple.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

you just read an anti-joke

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why did the roof cave in? It was not structurally sound do to poor architecture

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She didnt have any arms

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Doctor Doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains! Really? Well that's the least of your problems. Your test came up HIV positive.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what does the monster eat after going to the dentist? the dentist

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the baby cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what has hair and can fly? a human.. i lied about the flying.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A horse walks into a bar Barman: Why the long face? Horse: just had a stroke

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the chicken rape your...wait, that's not how it goes!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

roses are red violets are blue, were stuck to gather like superglue in tell you get the flu, then I'm not touching you :)

thumb_up thumb_down +8

There are two angry guys in a park on their lunch break What do they do? They eat their sandwich and go back to work to settle a peace treaty.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares? Seriously, who, on this planet, bothers to care about such a trivial matter? Is it really that important to you that must be given clarification as to why a random bird species just happened to cross a road? Will knowing benefit your life in some fashion? Well I'd like to know how. Ha! Perhaps you feel that, if you have the answer revealed to you, it will give you extra guidance of some sort in raising a chicken as a pet, or training a chicken to perform tricks for an animal contest, or something along those lines. Well I'm afraid you are out of luck, as I will not tell you. By reading this passage, you are wasting so much precious time. As you keep reading, seconds pass and you only waste more. You could be doing so much more with your life right now. Instead, you could be studying a topic that you might need to be knowledgeable about in the future. You could be shopping for goods. You could be painting a nice picture, writing a short story, or composing a piece of music. You could be getting exercise, or cleaning your house, or spending time with family, or even raising money for charity. There are countless meaningful tasks that you could be carrying out which would benefit you and others around you, including those who are less fortunate than you. But no. Instead you choose to do nothing, reading useless and forgettable anti-jokes on a crummy website, with a strange, fruitless desire of knowing why a chicken crossed a road. You must have such a sad life. You know what? I pity you, so I have decided that I will tell you why the chicken crossed the road. But only if you want to know. You might not want to know by this point. Do you still want to know? Are you sure you do? Are you really, really sure? Because I'm gonna tell you, regardless. Just keep reading! Don't take your eyes off the screen! You will find out exactly why the chicken crossed the road in 3... 2...1... and here we go! Ready, kids? The chicken crossed the road because... because... because... whoops, actually, I forgot. Sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Is that a banana in your pocket, or do you just have an erection?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the doctor say to the obese person? You have diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops