Whats worse than finding a worm in an apple? having a worm sized penis.

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What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after his operation.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's DEAD!

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there once was a man from Nantucket. I want to ride in a helicopter.

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Your mom is so fat she decided to get out of bed and exercise because she realized her health would become serious and wanted ot do something about it.

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Good because it is important to keep food chilled to prevent it from spoiling and wasting you money

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? Let's go play on our bikes.

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How do you stop a train? You stand in front of it.

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What did farmer brown say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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Yo momma's so fat that when she asked the doctor, he said she could have such bad cardiovascular problems if yo mamma keep the typical sedentary habits, wich consist in a diet with a lots of fat and sugar, the lack of physical exercise and genetical characterists which make a person get fatter more easily.

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Potatoes have skin. I have skin. Therefore, I am a potato.

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A cat walks into a bar. She belongs to the owner, so he gives her a saucer of milk.

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Ask me if I'm well Are you well? No

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An elephant stomped on a mouse. What did the mouse say? Nothing, the mouse was incapable of speech due to the elephants actions.

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Friend: Hey dude, you wanna come to my house after school and do some Meth? Other Friend: Nah I dont wanna get scabs all over my skin, disgusting teeth, and im not in the mood for dying early. Im good here.

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What do you call a Man who likes little childeren A Nittany Lion.

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Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

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Why did the officer arrest the black man? Because he suspected him of littering. ...and because he was black.

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How do you know if an elephant has been in your fridge? If it is laying in pieces around the crumbled wreckage of your house. [L]

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3 blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The 1 blonde says they're deer tracks. The 2 blonde says they're elk tracks. The 3 blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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1+1=2

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What did the baby do when it crossed the rode? It didn't get across it got hit by a car.

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69

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They beat her mercilessly.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops