What do Michael Jackson and most Catholic priests have in common? They're dead.

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You wake, and up for a second you are dazed. Then you open your eyes slowly because you are afraid of what is to come. You then remember oh right I had a sleepover at john smith's house.

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what did the judgmental teacher say to a challenged student? your stupid

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Q: How do you get a giraffe into a refrigerator? A: You open the door put the giraffe in and the close the door. Q: How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? A: You open the door to the refrigerator take the giraffe out then put the elephant in and close the door. Q: The Lion King is hosting an animal conference, all the animals attend but one, which one is it? A: The elephant it's in the fridge Q: You have to cross a river that is inhabited by crocodiles how do you cross it? A: You swim across, the crocodiles are at the animal conference.

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A black man walks into a movie theatre... And pay for a ticket that would grant him access to watch the verity Of movies available to watch that month of screening. He picks the warhorse which was critically acclaimed by many respected critics. He watched and observed the positive and negative points of the the film. When it ended he took a long a ride home on the number 76 bus to ibswitch road where he lived during that time, and wrote about his opionion on the movie and how he thought the movie could be improved. He done this same routen for another six months, every saturday, until he died of aids shorty after a homosexual fling.

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Why did the teacher fall on her face? She was shot in the back of her head.

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What is the different between going to church and reading a newspaper? You can take your shoes off when you read a newspaper.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was in a van headed to the slaughterhouse.

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Four blonds are driving to Disney World when they come across a sign that says Disney World left, so they proceed to make a left at the next stop and have a wonderful time in what many people consider the most wonderful place in the world.

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What happened to the teenager who was raped and murdered? Who knows? They never found the body.

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Wha'ts the difference between Justin Beiber and a piece of hot muff garbage? Fart triscuits.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

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Why can't Anne Frank write a sequel? Because she's dead.

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a white guy walks into a bar luckily he is not an alcoholic and knows when to safely stop drinking and already gave his keys to a friend.

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A black, white, Asian, and Mexican are walking down the street. This is showing a good diverse community.

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Adeeeellllleeeee where are my shorts

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Who job is it to protect the forest? Obiously a male and/or female forest ranger of smokey the bear. It's that simple.

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Where did the cow go? To the slaughter house!!!

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What did the apple say to the carrot? Nothing, apples don't talk

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What do you do when your girlfriend is bleeding? She is probably on her period.

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why did the jew cross the road? He didnt. He got stuck in the wire fence.

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Why am I writing this? Cuz I am eating babies alive right now!

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how much did the asian man pay for his operation? nothing. he's dead.

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What is the difference between a pile of baby's and a new jeep? I don't have a brand new jeep in my garage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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