What's Donald Trump's favorite color? Green.

Knock knock. "Who's there?" "It's Mr. Johnson, your next door neighbor." "Come on in."

Roses are red Violets are blue Violets are actually purple or white

Knock Knock Who's there? Your a slut

How do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

2 gays monkeys walk into a bar.........

Patient- "Doctor, doctor help me! I've only got 59 seconds to live!" Doctor- "I'll be there in a minute."

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Lindsay Lohan

why did the turtle beat the rabbit ? because the rabbit eventually got shot

what happened when the boy jumped? he landed

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. And that's when I found out my Uncle Ted was a cross-dresser.

What's Kanye West's goal in life? To dash the hopes and dreams of Taylor Swift on national television.

Why don't flowers bite you when you pick them? Cuz they don't have a brain.

Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

roses are red violets are blue I lost my dog to typhoid it was an unfortunate case of bed luck

Why did the duck cross the road? To get cream cheese.

"Why the long face?" The bartender asked. "I was born with a severe cleft palette and a jaw deformity. The surgery lets me eat and drink but my parents couldn't afford the cosmetic part of the surgery, the scarring got worse as I grew older. Can I have a beer please?" I replied.

If I had xray vision I'd go to a black jack table and when the dealer dealt everyone there cards I would look at the hot girls boobs

don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!

MATH: if for every 1 minute for billy is 5 minutes and every 5 minutes is an hour than billy is on acid and needs to come down.

why did the feminist cross the road? to suck a dick

Roses are red Violets are blue I have amnesia HOW THE HELL DID I GET HERE?!?

How did the black guy survive from drowning? Years of Swimming lessons at his local YMCA

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...