I once saw my grandparents making love.. that's why I dont eat raisens

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What did the grape do when it got stepped on? Released some juice and burst its skin.

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Why did the student fail his test? He forget to study for it the night before.

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A man walks into a bar and says give me a 84 bourbon, when he gets it he spits it out and says this is no 84 bourbon this is a 74 scotch, So he asks for a 68 brandy , when he gets it he spits it out again in disgust saying this isn't a 68 brandy this is a 87 whiskey!, than the old man next to him says here try this, the man says what is it?, the old man just says try it, so the man does, he spits it out and shouts this is urine!, the old man says correct, now tell me how old i am.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a buddhist monk walk into a bar. The bartender says " What are you drinking?"

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Why was the black man unemployed? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy became cold easily.

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What's funnier than an anti-joke? Sarcasm.

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Q: How does 5 gay people walk together? A: In One Direction.

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What's more boring than watching grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

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i'm an inbred jew - Barras

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what do you call a farm without animals a house with a big yard

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My name is Dave I like poems Microwave ummmmmmmmm (enter word that rhymes with poems)

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Word Problem Q.John has 32 candy bars. He eats twenty eight of them. What does he have now? A. Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

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What's the difference between a black man and a Jew? The sandwich is hidden under the couch, and is non-migratory.

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What's the scariest thing about the dark? There's a black man in my bed.

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Why do babies have soft spots? The skull of a baby is made up of skull bones, and in the places where the bones meet there are soft spots made up of a strong cartilage to allow the skull to grow with the baby's brain.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "My wife is dying of terminal brain cancer."

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky? It had no wings.

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Why did Johnny close the door on Sally's face? Because Johnny is a dick.

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If George Washington was the first president, and Barack Obama is the latest, how old is my grandma?

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I am paralyzed from the neck down.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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What's Donald Trump's favorite color? Green.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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