Whats the difference between eating an egg and an abortion? Think about it.

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How many Soviet Russians does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, in Soviet Russia, light bulbs are an unavailable commodity because the tyrannical government has called for a ban on unnatural illumination. A fact which is not lost on Mikhail, the light bulb maker whose wife died because his lack of business caused him to miss payments on his hospital bills.

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I told my friend one of these anti-jokes, he took it seriously and beat my head with a bat.

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Q) A Christian, slightly disabled but perfectly capable man has a packet of Jaffa Cakes. He strolls casually toward the edge of a cliff, rapidly checking his watch. The man slowly examins the packet before gradually opening the packaging. First the box, then the packet. He quickly throws the jaffa cakes over the edge of the cliff, Why? A) The man doesnt like jaffa cakes

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a Dyslexic, Agnostic, Insomniac stayed up all night, wondering if there really was a dog.

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You know what happens when you plant a baby into the soil and give it lots of sun and water? It dies.

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why did the car go to the bathroom? it had gas.

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How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get him a ladder and help him down.

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What's worse than hitting your funny bone? Nothing

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Who is it?

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Sam slept and never woke up again.. Because he followed his dream.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They then proceed to bake into tasty pastries which are then eaten for snacks or maybe a light breakfast.

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What happened to the chicken when it crossed the road? Nothing because the cars that almost hit it swerved off the road.

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why is justin bieber so pale? Because he hasn't come out of the closet.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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Q: What did the serail rapist say to his best friend? A: You're a good friend

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Whi can't John sleep? Because he is dead!

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Then none of us want to be right.

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Yo momma so ugly when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, No Professionals."

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Stop making fun of Stevie Wonder, you dont seen what he has.

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Why wasn't the boy at school? Obviously it was the weekend.

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What's worse than walking into a lampost? Your seven year old child accidentally finding and watching a sex tape that you made years ago.

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Why did the chicken cross the traffic filled road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? Chicken delivery.

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Why was the house on fire? A dog peed on it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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