All work and no play makes Johnny successful in his field of interest.

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Have you ever had sex with a woman (or several at once) and suddenly thought somethi... Moral: Nevermind, like you ever had sex! LOL!

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I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

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Q:: when artificial intelligence takes over the planet, what will become of anti-joke.com? A:: idk, but my cousin's girlfriend and I will get naked together and she will get on top of me and tell me I'm awesome and that my d*ck feels really good inside her. you see by the time AI takes over, the means to create virtual reality experiences will be greatly enhanced.

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here's a joke: Ron Paul: Hope for America

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What does Mickey mouse do every day? Minnie mouse

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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How do you keep your dog warm? Put antifreeze in its water dish.

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Want to hear a joke? Justin Bieber

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how much does a pirate pay for an earing? $2.50

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Your mother is so fat that she will die relatively early because of poor health.

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your mama smells so bad she should probably go take a shower.

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How do you make a chicken laugh. By showing it how to cross the road

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What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing

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A: Knock, knock. B:Who's there? A: It's your neighbor, Sam. B: Oh, well my extended family is over for dinner at the moment. Would you mind coming back later? A: I suppose that would be alright.

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Why did the black guy not have friends He was socialy awkward

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Take my wife. . . . to the hospital. She is dying from a gunshot wound to the head.

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Q. What do Jack the Ripper and Winnie the Pooh have in common? A. Same middle name.

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How Long is a Chinese man.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, my chickens aren't allowed in rural areas...

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The AIDS patient was gay

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How do you give a 90 year old woman a pap smear? You don't

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How come Hellen Keller couldn't drive? Because she was blind and deaf, therefore incapable of performing such a task.

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What did the blind, deaf orphan get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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