poopy is poopy

pretty soon we'll all be dead

Which disney princess always stays old? Snow White

Why couldn't the old man see the Moon? Because he was blind and it was daytime.

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Fairy floss" "Fairy floss who?" "I'm sugar coating your Cancer diagnoses"

A horse walks in to a bar. The bartender asks: "why the long face?" The horse didn't respond, because it's a horse.

What has wheels and is green all over? Grass... I was just kidding about the wheels.

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If I had a nickel for everyday I lived...... I would get a nickel a day

A man walked into a bar Ouch!

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Names.

why did the cow cross the road because pigs were not flying i had to write it hurts

Guess what? Random shit. Why? Because almost nobody looks at the newest jokes to realize that 99.999% of jokes that just say random shit never get above the 0 mark.

Why was the cat meowing at the chicken? Because Sally got hit by a fridge.

What do you call a dolphin without a head? Dead.

If you can cut half a rope. You can cut the whole rope.

Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. In the world of cardinal numbers, protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary. You should not judge them by the standards of human society. It's ignorant and offensive.

Q: why can't women drive? A: because there is no road between the kitchen and the bedroom

Why did the bud driver drop his ice cream? Because he hit a boy.

Kevin+Sean sitting in a tree enjoying mcdonald's free wifi.

Justin Beiber

A boy asks his teacher for a eraser....he was given a blue pen. Turns out he was in space.

A haiku for you Would not provide enough space To say all the nice

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Daddy drinks, Because you cry.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...