What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

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Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

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Why did the baby die? Because I refused to feed it.

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Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

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Your momma is so fat that she could benefit from loosing a couple of pounds.

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Why did the guy go to the store? He really doesn't want you to know every detail of his life.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're adopted.

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How do you stop a black man from drowning? Through him a survival buoy

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What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

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My name is Will I am a real homosexual

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420

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Henry threw it well.

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How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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What did the girl with cancer get for her birthday? Hairspray.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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little miss muffit sat on her tuffit eating her curds and weigh along came a spider and sat down beside her and said hey whats in the bowl?

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was blind.

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If X = 3 and Y = 7, what is X + Y = ? It doesn't matter. You forgot to put your name on the test which means you got an automatic fail.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? It's dependent on many factors, like the size of the babies and the tub. It would be a horrific endeavor, and you should probably stop thinking about such things.

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Find x X + 2 = 5 ^ I found it

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Knock knock. Who's there? Stop fucking around I told you I was coming. I'm sorry. Come in.

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What do elves get for Christmas? Overtime.

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I went out for a nice evening with my wife last week, and we kept getting dirty looks because I'm 42 and she's 19. I get that people are a little weird about that for whatever stupid reason, but it totally ruined our tenth anniversary.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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