A man found out that he had hit the lottery and would be receiving 300 million dollars, but he had to fly to china to do so. The man took a plane to China from New York and would arrive within the next several hours. Meanwhile, in australia a god-cow was producing infinitely large amounts of concentrated milk. His milk was so infinitely large in mass that it collapsed on its own mass and turned into black hole; absorbing the entire Earth. The man never got to receive his money from winning the lottery

2 guys shot up a morgue..... 13 bodies remain dead.

Why can't Vampires go out in the sunlight? Because they don't exist.

This isn't funny.

What happened to the man who poo'd too much? He started to eat less because his bowell movements started to cause him serious pain.

Why did Mary fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock? Who's there? Not Mary.

A man walked in the kitchen with a gun. He made a sandwich.

why does horse head huffer keep posting here? because he really doesn't understand the concept.

Hey man. what? squidbillies.

How many Jews can fit in a Volkswagen beetle? Four, although five is possible if you are not afraid of getting a ticket.

What do you call a lesbian eskimo? The name she was given at birth.

What is the biggest lie in the world How the **** should I know

I saw a stray dog the other day So I petted it and got on my way.

A man walks into a bar. He orders a Guinness.

Why did Phil Krahn cross the road? Because he is gay

What is big has a red nose and is funny Don't ask me I have never been out of my house

What's the difference between a dead baby and my dinner??? Nothing...

sex with dead people. they can't say no;)

A horse walks into a bar and the barman asks: "why the long face?" The horse, being a horse and thus being incapable of comprehending the complexities of conversation said nothing, and shit all over the floor.

A catholic priest gets a nun pregnant. He drowns the baby several months later.

Do Your Homework: Mum - Well Done Dad - Well Done Get An Award At School: Mum - Well Done Dad - Well Done Figure How To Adjust The Zoom On Your Computer: Mum & Dad - WOW HOW DO YOU KNOW SO MUCH, YOU'RE SO CLEVER, WHO TAUGHT YOU THIS?! Typical ...

A man walked into a bar. Ouch! He tripped over the little step at the entrance. But don't worry, he's not hurt, it just startled him for a second there. They should put a caution sign out front, somebody might get a serious injury. You can never be too safe, after all.

What's worse than being fired? Eating a bucket of diarrhea.

Can a match box? No, but a tin can.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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