Your mother is so average in weight and in attractiveness.

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Why did little Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms knock knock who's there? Not little Suzie.

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A grandma starts pinching her grandsons cheeks and saying who's a little cutie pie the baby begins to bleed cause his grandmas nails are peircing his skin

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Who got sarah pregnant? No one knows. She was a whore.

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What do you call a black guy with a job? Responsible.

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If a tree falls in the forrest and a women hears it does it make a sound? Why is there a tree in the kitchen.

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What's the same between a bike and a duck? They both have wheels. Except for the duck.

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what did the pumpkin muffin say to the blueberry muffin? nothing, because muffins can't talk.

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cory

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Your life

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I once was an adventurer like you. But then I quit.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it didnt it got hit by a bus.

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one stop shop

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A: What did the Orange say to the Mango? B: Sup Hommie?! A: Wtf.... (awkwardly walks away)

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You're so ugly, when yo' mama dropped you off at school, she kissed your forehead and called you beautiful.

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What has hands but can't clap? - A Quadraplegic

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Why did Timmy fall off his swing? The Holocaust

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What do u call a six year old boy holding a gun. illegal

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Whats worse than losing your phone? Buying a new one and then losing that

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If boobs are round. And so are balls. Then i just cant figure out why the sky is blue?

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus

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Why couldn't Ariel talk in the Little Mermaid? Someone slit her throat.

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How do you tell if a black man is ok? Poke it with a very long pole and keep your distance...

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Magic! Well not really, you see, people that are stressed have the tendency to remain far longer into the state of hypnosis because their body conciously and subconciously (I am typoing it, but I cant bother to type it correctly fuck it) seek out the state of peace that hypnosis gives more often. Anyway, I know another thing that helps relieve stress, cough... Now, did you know that if you push your nose upwards slightly, you will feel a finger between your legs? its because nerve endings are connected that way, give it a go.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops