What do a software designer, a civil engineer, an airline pilot, and a long-distance swimmer's support team have in common? All of them use angles and trigonometric ratios to help solve problems.

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How do you confuse a black man? Call him from a blocked number and I say "I love you"

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What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Everything.

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Who are the faster readers? New Yorkers, they through 110 stories in 5 seconds

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i named my son Frodo because he was little

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Two penguins in a bath tub, one says "Pass me the soap" and the other one says "What do you think I am, a radio!"

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I FEEL LIKE I'M RIDING ON A CLOUD actually it's physically impossible to ride on clouds because they are sparsely situated ice particles.

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What do an owl and a squirrel have in common? They can both fly! Except for the squirrel.

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Whats red and hurts your teeth? A brick

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What's black, white and red all over? A nun that fell down a flight of stairs

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No reason.

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Yo' Mama's so old that her age is over the average age of most people.

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What word starts with N and ends with R that you never want to call a black person? Neighbor.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? John.

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A flea walks into a bar. Nobody notices because it is a very small insect

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What happens when an old lady bumps into a black man in the middle of the night? He politely offers her help getting home and she accepts.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting a handjob from Edward scissor hands

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What happened to the homeless guy when a woman gave him five dollars? He shot the woman because he is mentally retarded.

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Kobe Bryant passing the ball

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What is better than one trillion dollars? One trillion and one dollars... duh.

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Chuck Norris never shows emotion!!!... because he is a pragmatic person and thinks in a more logical manner.

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Hey how was your audition?" "yeah really good, I got in...

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I fantasize about having sex with a moose

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Did I tell you about when I hit a cat with my car? No, what happened? I hit a cat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops