It's good to be a scientist and great to be a biologist. However, it is never okay to be a scientologist.

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why didnt the black guy die on the bus fire? The fire was in the front of the bus!

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Whats the difference between harry potter and the Jews? Harry potter could escape the chambers.

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What did the duck say to the other duck? Something, But us humans don't speak there language to understand

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how fast does it take to kill a blonde? Give me a gun and i will find out

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what's purple and plastic purple plastic

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Q.what did god say when he made the first black person? A.oh shit i burnt it.

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What do u call a woman geometry teacher. Santains wife.

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How do you stop your golf ball from hitting a goose? You dont.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Charles Grodin. Charles Grodin who? Exactly.

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A professor of literature asked me, "Young Sir, why are you burning those books?" I replied, "Because I need a fire to cremate the bones of your 3 sisters that I violently raped and murdered" He smirked in a witty and arrogant fashion, until raising his head and saying, "Bond, James Bond" He continued to massage his dick with his own pubic hairs before collapsing and dying

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You wanna know what's totally out of this world? The moon.

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Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

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What did the fish say when he swam into the wall? DAM!

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the seat next to you? A: Whatever his name happens to be.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A watch and a pair of socks.

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Why did Hitler try to take over the world? Hitler wanted to spread the Nazi (National Socialism) idea, He also wanted to destroy the Jews(Christian and non-Christian) and many other groups of people using the prevailing scientific idea of the day eugenics and survival of the fittest

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Q. Why did the lady scream when she saw her husband? A. Because he was dead.

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What's green and has wheels? The Holocaust. I lied about everything.

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A circus clown riding the cutest miniture Shetland pony both fall over a cliff and die.

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An apple a day keeps the doctor away? What about the vampires?

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A guy walks into a bar. But it was a solid steel bar and suffered severe wounds and a concussion. Lucky for him a bystander saw this happen and called 911. The man was transported to a hospital where he eventually made a full recovery and returned to work after one year.

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Why did the male propagate the female? Because he was drugged. Slyly, this foxy female had slipped the male the date rape drug and a dangerous amount of viagra. During intercourse, the male ripped a gaping hole in the female's stomach and killed her. He woke up confused inside a dead stinking corpse.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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