Why did Bob stop at the light? Because it was red and not doing so would be illegal.

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Have you seen stevie wonders new piano? No Well it's really nice

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why is dog animal? it is not fish! 18 fits of has hair only have is Buddhist

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Abbie im pretty sure your birth certificate is an apology from the condom factory

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Who. Who who? "My name ism't really who, it's Thomas. I thought it'd be funny if I made you say who who, as though imitating an owl. However, I understand that childish jokes like that are not funny and if anything stupid and immature. I am sorry for wasting your time. I will go continue my solitary life alone in a crappy tenement... Damn government. They have money to fight wars against foreign countries and yet no money goes to feeding the poor. Do you think life of easy for me loving like this?! I'm such a lost cause not even my own parents want to see me! And I'll be damned if they're still alive. A dad who beat me and got drunk even night, and a mom with breast cancer"(Thomas, overwhelmed, proceeds to have a mental breakdown). The man at the door comes out to comfort him. "It's alright man. i'll help you out." He let's Jeffrey stay with him for the next four months. They both get raped by a T-Rex.

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A man had come into a bar. No wait, it was a horse. A man had come into a horse.

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Q: Why didn't the dirty man jump into the shower? A: Because he spotted the potential danger to jump into a slippery shower and proceeded with caution.

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A seal walks into a club...and is taken in custody by animal control due to the club having a no animal policy.

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Dani Barton is not that! She is a great girl with a strong heart and feelings. The statement below is a joke, hence why it was published on AntiJokes. This is NOT a joke however.

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What's red and can't speak ? A strawberry

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A blind fish.

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A man walks into a bar, and is brutally slaughtered by eight drunk customers.

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Why is the moon gray? Why is it not?

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the sky is green no it is not

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If I were a cat, would you help with the toast?

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing hide and seek with Dennis Ferguson

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What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because it looked both ways and saw no cars coming.

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Q:What did Batman say to Robin just before they got into the Batmobile? A:"Robin get in the Batmobile"

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What is green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who's driving? The taxi driver.

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How many blondes does it take to walk into a bar? One I guess. I don't know if I understand the question.

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Why is Megan Fox so hot? Because the air conditioning broke.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Anything you like, he's blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops